The Oftentimes Tragic Lives of the Rich and Famous

The headline news of this past week included reports of the deaths of at least three rich and famous people - Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson. Each one made a lot of money in their time. Each one also made relatively significant marks on our society (if not the world!). They were rich and famous! But in the end, their wealth and notoreity still did not allow them to escape what is inevitable for all of us - that is, physical death.

Why is it that so many of us admire people like this and make it our goal to be like them - to be rich and famous? Have we ever really taken the time to discover what it's really like to be in their shoes - to be rich and famous? Each one of these three individuals were a part of my growing up. I, too, admired each of them at some point in my life. However, I would submit that the lives of these three people (as is so often the case for those who are rich and famous) were testimonies of how tragic things can get because of money and fame. If we really looked at what happens to these people - I mean really looked into the true details of their lives - I am guessing that many of us wouldn't want to have any part of being rich and famous.

Take Ed McMahon for example. He was Johnny Carson's faithful side-kick on the Tonight Show for 30+ years. Always laughing, always smiling, always well-dressed, always happy, always on television and in the limelight, etc. Not a care in the world, right? Well, that's what we all thought was going on in his life. But, if you pulled back the curtains on his personal life and away from the bright lights of the television cameras, there was a lot of heartache and tragedy. Two failed marriages before his third, one of his six children died very young, and near the end of his life a couple of years ago he actually needed financial help from a merciful Donald Trump to even be able to stay in his Beverly Hills mansion. After all the money he made through the years, he was bankrupt at the end. How tragic...

And what about Farrah Fawcett? This Texas girl from Corpus Christi was dubbed one of the ten most beautiful co-eds in America while attending the university in Austin in the 1970's. This designation launched her career in show business, specifically as one of "Charlie's Angels" on the television show with that name. Following one season in that limelight, she became arguably the woman that every woman in America (if not the world) wanted to (and tried to) look like. Every man in America (and the world) knew about the beauty of Farrah Fawcett. From her stunningly gorgeous figure to her thick, blonde, tossled hair, she was considered every man's ideal woman. One incredible photo of her in a fabulous, red swimsuit sold millions and millions of copies (probably all to teenage boys and young men). It appeared as though she was completely at the top of the world - everything was going her way, right? But, after the initial fortune and fame she enjoyed, her life thereafter also included a lot of tragedy. A failed marriage after six years to Lee Majors, a very limited acting career with very little evidence of greatness following several more dramatic parts in a few movies, an out-of-wedlock child (currently serving time for a drug-possession charge in the Los Angeles County Jail) with her long-time partner but never her married spouse Ryan O'Neal, and a persistent lack of respect and privacy over the past few years while dealing with the terrible effects of and costly treatment for anal cancer (including a more secretive trip to Germany to get some relief from the news cameras). From all the reports you can read off the internet, it would appear as though her life ended with unhappiness and a lot of dissatisfaction (not to mention way too early).

Finally, there is the tragic life of Michael Jackson. I distinctly remember seeing he and his four other brothers on TV when they broke out as The Jackson Five in the 1970's (when Michael was only 8 or 9 years old). Wow. They were so good! What great talent! I couldn't get enough of them. My sister and I used to sit and listen to their albums over and over again. And up until the early 80's, Michael seemed to be at the top of his game and more incredible as a musician and dancer every moment he lived. Did you know that he actually lived at home with his parents until he was close to 30, even after making millions and millions of dollars? But then, with all that fortune and fame, what happened to Michael Jackson? It's not a very pretty picture to look at the final 15-20 years of his life. Being rich and famous seemed to really, really change him, and in my opinion not for the better. Michael died at the much too young age of fifty with over 30-40 million dollars in debt, and with a besmirched and sordid reputation involving alleged child molestation, persistent troubles with harmful prescription drug use and unexplained physical disfigurations to his face/body from who knows what treatments he experimented with over the years. Another extremely tragic life...

So, what can we all learn from all of this you say? Here's my thoughts in a nutshell. Be careful what you ask for. Being rich and famous might seem like a great thing to strive for, that is until you actually get there yourself. I'm sure that none of these three - Ed, Farrah or Michael - set out to have lives full of disappointments, heartaches and tragedies. But, that is what seems to find a lot of the rich and famous.

I think I'll start thanking God today for the abundance that I currently enjoy and realize that much more than that might not be very good (or healthy) for me in the long run.

If you have a minute, check out what Proverbs 15:16, Proverbs 16:18 and Proverbs 30:7-9 have to say. Good words from King Solomon down through the ages. Good words for each of us today.

Good 'Ol Benjamin Franklin

I came across some profound wisdom recently. I thought it was worth passing on. In my humble opinion, we've drifted a long ways away from how Benjamin Franklin saw his world. Maybe it's time we learned from one of our great Founding Fathers instead of just "drinking the Kool-Aid" distributed by people who only think they are hip? Sometimes "hip" isn't where we need to be. Read this and decide for yourself.

Benjamin Franklin’s 13 Principles for Success

During the course of Benjamin Franklin’s illustrious life, he recognized that certain ideologies helped bring him his remarkable success. He developed a simple method to master the 13 principles: he gave special attention to a different principle each week, and in the course of a year, he practiced all 13 principles 4 different times.

1. Temperance – watch what you eat and drink and take care of your body.

2. Silence – don’t say anything if you can’t say something significant or something nice about somebody else.

3. Order – there’s a place for everything and everything should be in its place.

4. Resolution – do what has to be done and do what you say you’re going to do.

5. Frugality – waste nothing and be very careful about the way you use money.

6. Industry – don't waste your time. Get rid of the unnecessary tasks in your life, and always be doing something that is useful

7. Sincerity – be honest in all your communications. No deceit. No manipulation.

8. Justice – It's all about being kind and fair. Or as Franklin put it, "Wrong no one."

9. Moderation – avoid extremes and seek moderation. You don't have to win every argument, for example. You could agree to disagree.

10. Cleanliness – have a clean body, clean clothing, and a clean house, Franklin advocated this.

11. Tranquility – choose your fights carefully; don't get upset about those things that don't really matter. As Franklin wrote, "Be not disturbed at trifles."

12. Chastity – choose morality; no one ever got ahead ... forever ... by doing the wrong things ... for long.

13. Humility – be truly humble.

Finally, Sam Palmisano, CEO of IBM, once pointed this out, "Some of the best advice I ever received was unspoken. Over the course of my IBM career I've observed many CEO's, heads of state, and others in positions of great authority. I've noticed that some of the most effective leaders don't make themselves the center of attention."

The Chatterbox Cafe

This past Friday night, my wife Ellen and I had the relatively rare occasion (for us) of having dinner out - just my sweet bride and me! Our son Nathan was preoccuppied elsewhere, and it was a great opportunity for us to catch up with each other before heading into the weekend. We went to Papayas, a local family restaurant in our neighborhood that we had been to a couple of times, but not for quite awhile. We had a coupon for a discount (which we didn't end up using after all, but it got us in the door!). Anyway, while we were there, my mind went back to my childhood and the Chatterbox Cafe.

I grew up in rural Iowa, but very close to a little town near the center of the state called Radcliffe. And, Radcliffe had one restaurant - the Chatterbox Cafe. It was where most everyone in that small town (and the surrounding area where I lived) went for breakfast, morning coffee, lunch at noon, and then again for afternoon coffee. People also met their families there for lunch on Sundays after church. It was a very popular place - a place to see and to be seen at. I loved the Chatterbox Cafe.

We all need a place like the Chatterbox Cafe. Why? Because we all need other people. Even though we think we can be independent and isolated from each other (and we may even try to get away with doing that for awhile), we really can't. I am convinced that if you don't interact with other people and/or authentically share your life with someone, you die. God made us for relationship. We are wired for it. The Chatterbox Cafe was where people saw each other, interacted with each other, shared their lives with each other, and developed life long relationships. At various times you might find the same four or five people sitting there talking with each other three or four times a day, every day, 5 days a week, and for maybe twenty or thirty years straight! Being the city/suburban dweller that I am today, I think that might kind of drive me absolutely crazy! But, in small town America, this is how you thrive. On people. You know others, and you make yourself known to others by this daily routine. It's really pretty amazing.

Maybe that's why Starbucks became so popular several years ago. Maybe Starbucks was the more sophisticated, 21st century version of the Chatterbox Cafe?

One thing is for certain, people still need each other, and people can't live independent and/or isolated from each other for very long. If we do, we get sick, we get tired, we get cranky and oftentimes terribly out-of-sorts. We also miss the grand opportunities available to us to know and love other human beings traveling down similar paths, maybe with a different set of circumstances.

Tomorrow, make sure you find your own place to call the Chatterbox Cafe. For some it may be a coffee shop, for others it may be a school or a church. For still others, it may be something as simple as the break room at your place of employment. No matter where it is, get involved in other people's lives and enrich your own life in so doing. Find out about others by spending time with them and investing in their existence (and they in yours).

We'll go back to Papayas again. It was a wholesome and very authentic place. People loved being there together, allowing their lives to completely overlap. It was all very much like the Chatterbox Cafe.