Thanksgiving All Year Long!

Thanksgiving is one of my all-time favorite holidays! I absolutely love spending extra time away from work with my family and friends, as well as enjoying all the delicious foods of this magnificent time of the year! Yum-yum!

But, why do we sometimes relegate thanksgiving to just one day a year? I know that the American version of Thanksgiving originates from the feasts enjoyed by the Pilgrims in Plymouth, Massachusetts, around 1621 or so. They had a bountiful harvest and wanted to celebrate God's goodness to them for it. But, they were simply expressing their gratitude spontaneously and following a pattern of thanksgiving demonstrated by our ancestors down through the ages. There have probably been large thanksgiving feasts around since the beginning of time.

After having such a rich and meaningful Thanksgiving Day yesterday, I believe that we should celebrate thanksgiving all year long! So, in the interest of trying to help all of us do this, I've chosen a "who, what, where, when, why and how" format for your consideration.

Who
First and foremost, God is the One who should be thanked. He is the One who is to be praised, not only for who He is, but also for all He's done (Psalm 100:4). Let your thanksgiving be an intentional act of worship to God all year long!

What
Our thanksgiving should be a constant celebration. It should be an all-out dedication on our part to continual gratefulness. We can express our thanksgiving to God with words (prayers), with songs/singing (praise and worship tunes or hymns), and with a truly authentic gladness of heart for all that God has done all year long!

Where
The great thing about thanksgiving is that you can be grateful to God anywhere and everywhere! You can express your gratitude by yourself, or in a group, or in your church, or in your office, in your car, inside your home or outside your home, too. There are no limitations to where you have to be in order to give thanks to God. All year long you can tell Him how grateful you are no matter where you are at the time.

When
We can experience thanksgiving all the time. Every day of the year. And when we express our thanksgiving, frequently it will be completely involuntary. We won't even know when it is coming. It will be an immediate response to an event/experience in our life (if we let it). Our thanksgiving can and will be contagious and spontaneous, causing others to also give thanks all year long, too!

Why
Thanksgiving usually brings an abundance of peace to us personally, and furthermore contributes to peace for those around us as well (Jeremiah 30:19, II Corinthians 4:15 & 9:11, Ephesians 5:4). We should not be holding back when we are grateful. We should give it all to God because He is so worthy and deserves all of our praise and thanksgiving all year long!

How
Through prayer (I Timothy 2:1). By voicing our gratefulness to others. Through physical acts and dances for joy. By singing and making joyful noises unto the Lord (Psalm 69:30 & 95:2). Through demonstrating to others ways to be grateful. By involuntary expressions of thanksgiving in all circumstances, no matter what they may be (Philippians 4:6, I Timothy 4:4). And through setting an example of thankfulness in our own lives all year long.

So, while you are still enjoying the afterglow of yesterday's glorious Thanksgiving Day celebration with family/friends and great food, why not make a bold commitment to truly celebrate thanksgiving all year long this upcoming year? Or maybe even for the rest of your life?

Every Man is an Island

You've probably heard the expression "no man is an island." Frankly, I wonder if that's all wrong? I wonder if every man is an island is more like it. Let me explain...

I believe that you and I were created for relationship. I believe that you and I need relationship more than anything else in all the world. I believe that without truly relating to other people in our lives, we become "islands," completely separated from each other, which is not very healthy.

Why then are you and I so prone to times of isolation and broken relationships? Why do we unwittingly create barriers between us or establish "deep waters" that separate ourselves from the very people we should/could be relating to?

Has this been anyone else's experience or is it just me?

Take my important relationship with my wonderful wife, Ellen. She is absolutely one of the most highly relational people I have ever known. Thank God for that! She just thrives on relating to other people and sometimes I am just perplexed by how good she is at it. I really wish I was more like her some days. I really, really do! But instead, there are times when I sense that I am totally clamming up, creating an unwanted barrier between us. Usually I can't even figure out exactly why? Here's this highly relational, wonderful person in my life, and yet I am establishing "deep waters" around me to keep her at bay (so to speak). I don't get it?

And then there's my four children, those supremely important and wonderful offspring God blessed me and Ellen with as a family. I love them more than anything else in all the world, and I would do absolutely anything for any of them (I really, really would!). But, too often I sense that I am once again creating barriers between them and me. And I ask myself, "Why in the world am I doing this?" Here are these terrific young people in my life, and I'm establishing "deep waters" around me, keeping them at bay? What's with that?

How about other people in your life that you have opportunity to relate to? Like your parents, or those that you live around, or those you work with every day, or those you see at your church or school? Ever find yourself holding back from really relating to them? You realize of course that they probably are really great folks who also need relationship as much as you do, right? Why are we sometimes so prone to make "islands" out of ourselves when we were created for relationship?

Well, I have a couple of thoughts on this subject.

Relationships are hard. Relationships require a lot of us. Relationships frequently change. Sometimes we are not as willing as we should/could be to change with them. In an ideal sense, relationships are about us being willing to relate to that other person, not about whether that other person is satisfing my needs/wants/desires.

I also believe that you can only maintain a small number of truly deep and fulfilling relationships. We kid ourselves when we try to relate to hundreds or thousands of people. It just doesn't work. Large numbers like that are not true relationships. They are just casual acquaintances. People whose names simply fill up our address books and cell phones. True relationships are more intentional and more methodical and more sacrificial. They are also very rewarding and beneficial.

Yes, relationships are really the most important thing in this life. But, we frequently we mess them up, don't we? To the people we should/could love the most, we often become "islands" because we are afraid they might ask us to do something for them. Frequently we are unwilling to be that unselfish and vulnerable for them. Seems like we are often more willing to relate to someone and get along with someone in relationship as long as they agree with us and/or do what we want them to do. But when they demand something of us or ask us to commit to something that might interrupt our own selfish lives, we quickly become "islands."

So, it seems like every man is an island can be our relational experience. But, does it have to be? I am committing to working real hard from this moment to change that going forward. How about you? Will you join me?

No man is an island? Maybe they did get it right after all?

Lessons Learned from Defeat

First the easy one.

The Texas Rangers were soundly defeated by the San Francisco Giants in only five games in the 2010 World Series. I was bummed out about their defeat for days!

But, there was at least one obvious lesson to be learned from their disappointing defeat on November 1, 2010. That is: Great pitching almost always beats great hitting in baseball. Always has. Probably always will. While the Rangers made significant improvements to their pitching staff in the past several years, it wasn't quite enough to actually win a World Series.

I'm still a big Rangers fan, however! I can only hope that they will take note of this and other lessons learned from defeat.

Now for the more difficult one.

The Democrats were soundly defeated by the Republicans in the 2010 mid-term elections on November 2, 2010. Being a conservative, and generally a fairly routine backer of Republicans in most elections, I was kind of happy about that. As a matter of fact, I still am.

However, I think we all (regardless of our political persuasions) need to take note of some of the lessons learned from defeat while they are still fresh.

Now, I know that I'm kind of stepping out there with this blog and taking a big risk with some of you. These are simply my humble thoughts and are based on my long-held convictions. But, I hope you will understand that these words are not written to alienate any of you or have this become an issue that divides us in the future. I really mean that.

Lesson # 1 - A "big shift" towards a certain political direction (be it left or right) in one election usually shifts back in the next election. It is really, really difficult for one political party to win election after election after election in this country. There will occasionally be big swings in our voting results to the left or the right . But, these have a way of correcting themselves the next time people are given a chance to go to the polls. In other words, winning one election doesn't mean that much. Multiple elections in a row are what is significant.

Lesson # 2 - Politicians who primarily push their political ideologies and ignore the general will of the people do so at their own peril. I'm certain that a lot of Monday-morning quarterbacking must have been going on in several political circles following the 2010 elections. "Maybe we shouldn't have pushed so fast and so hard on certain volatile issues?" "Maybe we should have listened more closely to the overall mood of our country, paying closer attention to what many of the people of this country were trying to tell us?" I think the old adage of live and learn applies here.

Lesson # 3 - Liberty and freedom matters more than "progress" and change in this country. The United States of America was founded on the principles of individual liberties and freedom from any form of governmental tyranny. We as individual citizens still don't like being categorized into various "classes," or being told by the ruling party to pay excessive taxes to support stuff we really don't agree with. Americans didn't like that infringement by the British government on their liberty and freedom 200 years ago, and we still don't like it today. Don't mess with our liberty and freedom if that's what it takes to enact "progress" and change. It won't work.

Lesson # 4 - Strong support for and defense of our Constitution with governing based on same (versus political ideologies) is what works in this country. Going forward as a nation, everything we do in the halls of Congress should be checked against the Constitution first and no laws should even make it out of committee without passing a test of Constitution-compliance first. Adherence to the United States Constitution is what has made this country great, not political ideologies. Deviation from the long-standing principles of our Constitution will be the end of this nation's greatness.

Lesson # 5 - If you don't have the money for something, don't spend what you don't have. No matter how much you might want something to change or something to be a certain way, if you do not have the means by which to pay for it, it's just not the right idea. Period. Borrowing money and going into debt is only a good idea for rare occasions. You should only borrow money if you have a reasonable plan for how you plan to pay off that debt in the future, and that needs to square with all of your other obligations as well. It is foolish to spend borrowed money when you have no credible plan to pay it back in the future.

Well, there you have it. My thoughts on lessons learned from defeat. Not sure if what I've written aligns with your thinking, or if it is completely contrary to same. At a minimum, I hope it will cause you to consider the implications of elections in this country and prepare you to be an even better citizen the next time we go to the polls in 2012.

Go Rangers!

His was a life well-lived

Vernell G. Kvale - born September 30, 1931; died September 30, 2010. A complete life. His was a life well-lived.

I am thanking God today for the life of one of my favorite uncles. For the love he showed to me throughout his life, and for the inspiration he's been to me ever since his death.

Although it is usually ill-timed, we tend to appreciate someone we have loved and admired even more after they are already gone. I wonder why that is? Why do we tend to get so preoccupied with our own lives and our own affairs so much that we forget to honor those among us who have lived their lives well, and have blessed us (and others) immensely?

I don't have the answer to my own question. But, I can tell you this. Attending my uncle's funeral recently impacted me greatly. His was a life well-lived.

My Uncle Vernell lived most of his life in Lake Mills, Iowa. Except for a couple of years spent farming with my Dad following high school, and two years of active duty service in the United States Army following that, this small town of a few thousand people was his home. I admire the simplicity and wholesomeness that represents. I also admire the fact that he appeared to be perfectly content with living in the same community his entire life.

He married my Aunt Violet in 1956. That means that they were into their 55th year of marriage at his death. I admire the faithfulness and longevity that represents. He loved her greatly and it showed! A testimony to his incredible love for her and his thinking of her needs all the way to the end was this story told to me by his son following the funeral. My aunt's birthday was just a week after his. So, a few weeks before he died when he was being taken to hospice, he made sure that his son purchased a birthday card and gift from him so that it would be there and given to her in case he wasn't around to give it to her himself. His was a life well-lived.

He was a loving and dedicated father to four living children, two daughters and two sons. He loved them greatly and it showed! He was also grandfather to four young grandchildren whom he loved dearly and they loved him back. I admire the commitment and dedication to others that represents. Another story told at the funeral conveyed the mutual love shared between my uncle and his grandchildren. When his life was coming to a close and he was already very weak and at hospice, one of his granddaughters really wanted to be with him, missing his tender, loving touch. So unprompted, she crawled up in the hospital bed with him to snuggle. Even though in a terribly weakened state, he still wrapped his arm around her as they lay there together quietly for several minutes. His was a life well-lived.

As to his vocations in life, he was a farmer, a manager of the Lake Mills Creamery, and a custodian at the Lake Mills Community School. Following his official retirement about thirteen years ago, he continued to perform some part-time carpentry with a friend and assisted various farmers in his community with their harvests. I admire the hard work ethic and lifetime productivity that represents. Knowing that he would eventually lose his battle with cancer after fighting it for ten years, he actively participated in the planning of his own funeral service. Because of his genuine love for children at the school where he was custodian for ten years, he requested a choir from the school sing at his service. And they did. It was an absolutely wonderful and refreshing patriotic tribute to America. His was a life well-lived.

Finally, nearest and dearest to my heart is the fact that my uncle was a writer, and a believer in Jesus Christ.

As to his writing, throughout his life he wrote prose and poetry and shared many of his original writings at Memorial Day and Veterans' Day ceremonies. With only a simple high school education, he also wrote meaningful pieces for friends and family in his community, blessing them at birthday or retirement celebrations.

As to his Christian faith, it was obvious to me from words spoken at the funeral that my uncle had a deep and abiding faith in Christ. The pastor who conducted the services reflected on numerous conversations with my uncle and communicated effectively some intimate references to assurance of my uncle's salvation and personal relationship with Christ.

Yes, his was a life well-lived. Thank you, Uncle Vernell.

May we all express our love and openly appreciate someone we admire while they are still living.

I absolutely LOVE Texas Rangers baseball!

If you know anything about me, you probably already know that I absolutely LOVE Texas Rangers baseball! I love almost everything about it! And, this year, my love for this team may payoff in new ways as "my team" is actually going to the playoffs! Yay! And, hopefully they will go deep in the playoffs! Hopefully...

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, we went to a Rangers game at the Ballpark in Arlington (we also went to another game on my birthday, and are going to their final game of the season again today, too!). At that game, I told my sweet wife, Ellen, that I wanted to write down all the various experiences of a Rangers game so that I could blog about it later. Why shouldn't everyone who reads this blog learn more about one of my absolute favorite things? :-)

So, here's a portion of my list of experiences so that you all can better understand why I absolutely LOVE Texas Rangers baseball:

• Even as you enter/approach the stadium, there are the nicest people who greet you with a smile and say, "Welcome to the Ballpark!" I love that.
• I'm normally not much of a "groupie" type guy, but I love it that almost everyone wears Rangers shirts/gear to the games.
• I love seeing all the young kids at Rangers games! They are usually so happy and smiling and just delighted to be there with their parents/grandparents (well, at least most of them are!).
• I love the neatly manicured grass of the field and how the maintenance crews spray down the infield with water, getting it to look picture perfect before play begins.
• They usually have a ceremonial first pitch, giving one special person the privilege of having his or her moment in the sun. I love that! The other night it was a boy who was born without arms. He made the first pitch! He threw the ball with his foot. The ball actually made it to the catcher's glove, too! Amazing! What a thrill for that boy. He'll never forget that, I'm sure.
• I love the excitement of the crowd as the announcer gives the starting line-ups for "Your Texas Rangers!"
• I get chills up and down my spine as The Star Spangled Banner is played, and we all remove our caps, stand in attention gazing at the flag and salute our country.
• I love it that you can still bring your own food/drinks into the Ballpark if you want to. We (well, actually it's Ellen!) usually pack a lot of snacks and eat way more than we should. But, it's baseball, for goodness sake!
• I love the video board and highlights from previous games. And, they always show the "positives" from those games, never the "negatives."
• I love that they have short clips of songs for each Rangers batter as they come up to the plate. I love it that several of the Rangers have Christian songs/messages for their clip.
• When you are at a baseball game, you get a chance to sit outside for three plus hours. Most of the time it is really glorious to be out there enjoying the fresh air and cool evening breezes.
• At certain points in the game, the organist will play certain little songs/chords that help get the crowd fired up again and cheering for the Rangers. I love that!
• I love the fact that you can just sit there for three plus hours if you want to and watch the game and/or the people around you and/or the video board and not say anything if you don't want to. To me, baseball is a lot like what other people might enjoy about fishing.
• I love it that they shoot off fireworks when a Rangers player hits a home run.
• I love the fact that even though individual players probably can't hear us when we yell encouragement to them from the stands, we still do it anyway. It creates a constant murmur and/or buzz in the crowd, and that's just baseball.
• Being at Rangers games is still very much a family-friendly activity. I love that! It is still an affordable form of entertainment, there are lots and lots of activities for kids (like one of my favorites, the Longball Blast), and you can simply just enjoy being together during the games without any pressure to be involved in anything else.
• I love the "bump music" between most innings and the standard favorite of singing of "Deep in the Heart of Texas" (complete with clapping) around the 5th inning.
• Who doesn't like the Dot Race? And who doesn't slip back into being a kid again for just a minute while those silly people dressed up as dots run? I love that.
• I love it that they play Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" when the opposing pitcher is in trouble and "give him the boot" when he leaves the game.
• I love the "Stealing Third Base" moment when some kid gets a chance to run like mad to try and steal the base (literally) and make it back to where he or she started before time is up. Plus, if they do it (and a lot of grace is usually extended for this), they get to take that base home with them. How cool!
• I love it that the Rangers still have Dollar Hot Dog nights. Not a big fan of hot dogs myself, but they are so much a part of baseball. And, only a buck for one of those things? What a bargain!
• I love singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" during the 7th inning stretch and then dancing to "Cotton-Eyed Joe" after that. It gets everyone up on their feet moving and smiling and getting their groove on! Even me!
• When they do it, I love the "Kiss Cam" during breaks between innings late in the game. So fun to see the cameras catch couples unexpectedly and then watch them kiss (or not if the couple happens to not be a couple and only on their first date! Ha.)
• In some ballparks they have someone sing "God Bless America" after the 7th inning also. Love that song!
• And finally, at the ballpark you sometimes end up talking with the people around you during the game and nearly become friends by the time 9 innings are over. How many places does that occur these days?

So, that's a little bit about why I absolutely LOVE Texas Rangers baseball! I hope the Rangers play well into October, and can I even dream that they make it all the way to the World Series?

My biggest concern now is: What am I going to do from November through March without baseball?

I absolutely LOVE Texas Rangers baseball!

It had been 30 years

I believe that God gives special gifts to each of us in the form of wonderful people along the way in the span of our lives. He seems to bring these relationships into our lives at strategic points in our development in order to bless us in unusual ways. Our job is to notice the blessing He sends our way, and then thank Him for them, too.

God really blessed me when He allowed my life to overlap with Herrick and Mary Smith.

For a little over six months, this wonderful couple ministered to me at a vulnerable time in my life. I will be forever grateful to God for them!

Let me tell you the story...

It was late 1979, and I was a 25 year old single man working for HDR Architecture in Omaha. Kind of out of the blue, I was presented with a very unique opportunity to teach at the University of Florida for a limited six month period. In order to do this, however, I would need to take a leave of absence from my job, which I did.

Upon arriving in Gainesville, Florida (all alone, not knowing another soul there and a week before Christmas), I soon met Herrick (as he would be my boss for the next six months). He subsequently introduced me to his sweet wife, Mary, over dinner. We three became fast friends! Their overflowing love and selfless generosity spilled over onto me in numerous ways. They even quickly made me "part of their family" and invited me to their home for Christmas Eve.

I could go on and on about all the other things these two wonderful people did for me from that cold December to hot and muggy June in Gainesville. But, that one act of extreme kindness at Christmas impacted me in a very profound way. So much so that I decided I would commit to talking with them by phone every Christmas Eve thereafter (if possible), telling them how I would never forget their generosity towards me and thanking them again for it.

Fast forward to the year 2010.

Last weekend (just before the Labor Day holiday), I traveled to Florida to visit my long-time friend, Herrick, who lost his sweet wife of over 53 years in early August. She succumbed to the ravages of Alzheimer's, a terrible disease that had been diagnosed only a couple of years ago. Alzheimer's cut her wonderful life short, just a few months before her 85th birthday.

After receiving the news of Mary's untimely passing, I wanted to be with Herrick in the worst way. Since I was not able to attend her funeral, I felt compelled to go there and be with him. But, it had been 30 years since we had spent any time together.

What would it be like to be with him again, even if only for parts of two days? Would we even have that much to talk about? What could I do to bring comfort and companionship to this special friend who now found himself all alone in a house he shared with his wife for over 44 years? Was I even the one who should try to do this?

Needless to say, I was a little nervous as I flew on Southwest Airlines from Dallas to New Orleans to Tampa to Jacksonville, and then rented a car and drove the final leg of the journey into Gainesville. I so much wanted my visit to be helpful to Herrick in the midst of his grieving process. But, it had been 30 years.

What if it didn't go well talking with him? What would I do then? What if it was just too hard for either/both of us without his sweet wife, Mary, there? She was always the great conversationalist when we were together.

Well, suffice it to say, the visit ended up going very well. As a matter of fact, I believe we both benefited from our time together. It was a time of healing and a time of hope. I'm so very glad I followed through with the promptings I had to take this trip and spend that time with Herrick.

What lessons can be learned from all this?

• Don't forget to look for the special people God puts in your path to bless you.
• Don't forget to be one of the special people God may choose to use to bless someone else in a time of need.
• If you have been blessed, don't ever forget that blessing and remember to pass a similar blessing on to someone else if you are given the chance.
• If God lays a long-time friend on your heart, follow-through with contacting them now. You never know how important your friendship may be to them and/or how timely a call or a visit from you might be in their life right now.
• Thank God for all the special people He's placed in your path along the way.

It had been 30 years. Both of us said we wouldn't let that much time pass before we got together again.

Sometimes You Just Gotta Laugh Out Loud About Life

I'm usually a pretty serious guy. Just ask my wife, Ellen, and/or my family about that! I'll admit that I have frequently used this blog for "getting on my soapbox" about a lot of things that are going on in this world. Usually I write about things that appear to be going bad or wrong out there. And, there certainly are a lot of things that trouble me and cause me to get serious sometimes. But...

Sometimes you just gotta laugh out loud about life.

It was just a couple of days ago on Friday, sometime in the mid-afternoon. I had just received an e-mail at work that hit me kind of funny. So, I decided to forward it on to a couple of people I really love, who I thought might be amused by it as well. As fate would have it, the forwarded e-mail ended up triggering some persistent giggles on the part of at least one of the loved ones who received my forward. Then she called me. At the office, mind you! Well, my apologies to anyone who happened to be sitting around me at work that afternoon, particularly if they were trying to get something done on a Friday afternoon. In a truly serendipitous moment, we both absolutely lost it on the phone! Once the laughter started, it began to snowball even further, to the point of being just a little bit ridiculous! Tears flowed. Knees were slapped. Hilarity became contagious. And finally, I ended up saying, "Stop! Stop!" as I gasped for my next breath. It was a really, really big surprise to both of us! Not what either of us was expecting when the call commenced.

Sometimes you just gotta laugh out loud about life.

Earlier in the week, I received a series of e-mails about a particular subject from family members, including the one who caused me to get completely out of control on the phone on Friday. For some unknown reason, a little birdie inside of me said, "Oh, go ahead! Have some fun with this why don't you?" So, relatively uncharacteristically of me, I did have fun with it. Probably fooled a lot of my family members who don't normally see me pulling pranks or laughing that much or hearing jokes emanating from my mouth. But, I just couldn't resist! I couldn't pass up the opportunity to smile, giggle, and/or laugh to myself. Maybe the stresses of life have been taking their toll on me lately? Maybe it was time for me to just have some fun and relax a bit? Chill out about things happening in my life? I don't know exactly what was going on, but...

Sometimes you just gotta laugh out loud about life.

Many, many years ago, I remember experiencing totally uncontrollable laughter unexpectedly with my Mom. Neither of us are particularly funny people, as a rule. But, in this particular instance, we were over-the-top ourageous in our laughter. We just could not stop no matter what we did. It was another tears flowing, knees slapping, unending hilarity, gasping for a breath moment. Too funny! What made it even funnier was that my Dad was there, but he wasn't getting what we were laughing at. The more my Mom and I laughed, the more my Dad appeared to become completely disgusted with the two of us. It was a completely infectious moment for my Mom and me. We literally could not help ourselves. I am beginning to giggle just thinking about it! Have you ever had one of those moments (kind of like the "I love to laugh" scene in the movie Mary Poppins)? If so, cherish the memory! Remember moments like that when life gets hard and when things don't seem to be going the way you want them to go. Let it go because...

Sometimes you just gotta laugh out loud about life.

It says in Proverbs 17:22 that "A joyful heart is good medicine." Also, I believe it was author and humorist Erma Bombeck who once said (after she found out she had terminal cancer) that if she had it to do all over again, she'd laugh more. Good advice! Let's all laugh more!

So, for today - nothing serious, nothing dire, nothing too spiritual or intellectual or political. I'll save all that for some other blog, some other week. Rather, for today...

Sometimes you just gotta laugh out loud about life.

Got a good laughter story to share? I'd love to hear it. :-) Oh, and did you heard the one about...

There ought to be a law!

This past Friday, I spent the whole day in a seminar entitled, "Legal Issues for Texas Architects and Landscape Architects." Since I am a licensed Landscape Architect in the State of Texas, I needed some continuing education credits for my annual license renewal and this seminar gave me eight TX CEPHs, including the required one for Sustainable Design and the required one for Barrier-Free Design. Those of you not in the architecture or engineering profession might be saying to yourselves right now, "Ho-hum..." Keep reading.

The whole purpose behind requiring licensed design professionals in the State of Texas to garner a certain number of continuing education credits each year for renewal of their licenses is to keep them current in their professions. It also helps remind them on an annual basis of their overall charge in having a license issued by the state - that is to protect the health, safety and welfare of the citizens of Texas as we practice. Whew! Some of you might still be saying, "So what?" Keep reading.

Well, about halfway through the seminar the thought occurred to me that everything I was hearing that day (from eventually all six attorneys who spoke to us), had to do with the miscellaneous interpretations of laws that had been passed by either our federal or state governments in recent years. Needless to say, there were times when I even felt like the speakers did not fully comprehend the laws that had been passed, even though they were declared to be the experts of them! Very frequently the speakers went back through all of the numerous, progressive "add-ons" to the original laws that had been passed, describing the necessities for how laws had to be modified to address issues that weren't covered or even fully considered by the initial piece of legislation. Ugh!

That is when it hit me. I remember hearing this phrase many times growing up. We in this country for too long have been all too quick to say, "There ought to be a law!" Something doesn't set well with us, we see something we don't like happening, someone we know is somehow made uncomfortable by a circumstance and we immediately say to ourselves, "There ought to be a law!"

I'm here to tell you that I think our mantra going forward should rather be, "There ought to be fewer laws!"

For the past 40-50 years when we as a nation have come up against something we don't like and/or don't think should be happening, our knee-jerk reaction has frequently been to introduce legislation attempting to fix or change whatever we personally deem wrong. Oftentimes without regard for any other point of view. After all, too frequently in this country it's all about me, right? And then, when a law is passed in its oftentimes compromised state, we frequently have to go back and amend that law over and over again to get it right. We seldom do.

I am beginning to think that this is no longer a good way to run a country. Rather, we should all just look around us, determine what each of us can do as individuals to make the necessary adjustments in our own lives to demonstrate a better way for others to follow, and then do that. Even if others don't follow, so what? Just live a life, set an example, prove that your way is the best way by living it and leave everyone else to their own business. It's still a free country, right? Right?

Case in point - one of the topics at my seminar on Friday had to do with laws dealing with accessibility. What a great cause! We as a design community should be making sure that everything that gets built is as accessible as possible. However, universal accessibility for each and every possible instance everywhere in the world (no matter when it was built) is probably unrealistic and a big distortion of what was originally intended. Similarly, another topic at the seminar had to do with the "greening" of our buildings. Once again, a great cause! I support it. We as a design community should be making sure that everything we do in our responsibilities as licensed design professionals promotes sustainability. That just makes good common sense. Local materials, less energy, better health for occupants of our buildings, etc. However, you cannot legislate compulsary "greening" for each and every building type all over the world, nor should we even try to! It's just unrealistic to think it will happen! And the costs of attempting to do so will ruin us financially.

So today, we have a lot of cries for laws that mandate proper foods to eat, or mandate generic details for universal healthcare, or mandate the prohibition of certain activities, etc. I'm telling you, all of that is dangerous, and someday soon we may all discover that it is also probably regrettable.

Therefore, starting today, I'd like to advocate a nation-wide campaign that says we should change the language in our country from one that says, "There ought to be a law!" to one that says, "There ought to be fewer laws!" Anyone care to join me in this cause? In my humble opinion, our freedoms and liberty in this country depend on us doing this different in the future than we have done it in the immediate past.

There ought to be fewer laws.

It is not good for the man to be alone...

I'm alone in our house right now. My wife and youngest son are in Oregon visiting family/friends. I stayed home alone.

Truth be told, I was really looking forward to doing this alone thing. I always do. I always say to myself when I know that I will be alone and have the house to myself, "You can do this, you can do that. You can get all those things done that you're always wanting to do." I fool myself into thinking that I will be able to read books/magazines uninterrupted. That I will be able to set my own schedule for everything I do. That I will not have to worry about the schedule/activities of anyone else. Who am I kidding?

It is not good for the man to be alone.

God had it right when He spoke these words recorded in Genesis 2. Even though we are basically selfish creatures, frequently more self-focused/self-centered than we should be, we really do need each other. We need other people.

When I am alone (like my current situation), it seems my self-focus/self-centeredness increases. Not only that, I begin to almost resent other people who innocently invade my aloneness. When we are alone, generally not a lot of good happens. When we allow our self-focus/self-centeredness to increase, we can forget the value of other people in our lives and how much we really need them.

This past week, a friend of mine, Herrick, a friend I've known for over thirty years, lost his sweet wife, Mary. She finally succumbed to the ravages of a terrible disease that complicated and compromised her life the past several years. I ache for Herrick right now. He is alone in the home he shared with Mary for almost 50 years. Now, of course, for the time being, he does have people in his house - his children and their families, his friends, his neighbors, people from his church, etc. But, someday soon, he will have to face the fact that he is now all alone in that house. And, I am certain that when that happens, he will agree with God that, "It is not good for the man to be alone."

I don't think it is a coincidence that my circumstances of being alone are juxtaposed with my friend Herrick's being alone. I believe that God allowed this to teach me some very important lessons. It's not a mistake that I am seeing this being alone experience in fresh, new ways right now. My perspective on being alone is changing.

Am I saying that you should ALWAYS be around other people and never have a moment to yourself? No. I'm just saying that we all need to be careful when we are in the circumstance of being alone. Careful that we don't allow the self-focus/self-centeredness we all struggle with to deepen/grow. Rather, we need to turn this alone time into opportunities to bless other people. Here's a few things I might try to do the next several days while I am alone:

- I can pray for my wife and son, that they will have a wonderful time with family/friends.
- I can pray for my friend, Herrick, and his family; that God will comfort them as they mourn.
- I can write to my friend, Herrick, encouraging him in his time of need by telling him how much I loved his Mary, and remind him of all the wonderful ways the two of them lived life to the fullest.
- I can ask some neighbors out for lunch (as I did today), telling them with both my words and actions how much they mean to us as neighbors and how blessed we are to be living next to them.
- I can call some people I don't normally take the time to call and surprise them with that.

Well, I think you get the idea.

It is not good for the man to be alone. Seize the opportunity when you are alone the next time to think about the needs of someone else, not just your own. And then act on those thoughts. You probably won't regret it.

Now, off to that book I was going to read...

When Amateurs Are In Charge

Now that I am older (not really old mind you, just older), I find myself a little less tolerant of "amateurs."

But, before you jump all over me for being too harsh in my assessment of "amateurs," let me tell you that I completely understand that I was once an "amateur" myself. The really dumb things I did at a much earlier age (all the while thinking I was so doggone smart!) are totally embarrassing to me now. Wow. Why didn't someone tell me that I was such a rank "amateur" in so many areas? And I was. Believe me! Ugh.

Fortunately, I had several people who gave me multiple chances at strategic places in my life. They gave me chances to try and fail. They gave me chances to learn and grow. They even gave me chances to make dumb mistakes. They also gave me chances to learn valuable lessons from the dumb mistakes I made. Hallelujah for that!

The measurable consequences of my plentiful "amateur" mistakes were pretty small. I hope and pray that very few people were severely impacted by my true "amateur" status earlier in life.

Fast forward to today. Sure seems like there are a lot of "amateurs" out there, doesn't it? Sure seems like there are a lot of well-meaning people in several places trying and failing at their jobs, doesn't it? Sure seems to be a lot of people in need of a lot of learning and growing before they'll really be able to be good at what they do, doesn't it? From my perspective, there seems to be a lot of people making some really dumb mistakes affecting untold numbers of people. I believe that there is a plethora (I love that word - a la El Guappo from The Three Amigos!) of folks out there who really need some wisdom and a crash course on life (including lessons learned from same) before they'll ever be very good at their jobs/stations in life. Unfortunately, the mistakes being made today seem to be accelerating daily, compounding some daunting negative impacts on a lot of people, too. Am I the only one who thinks this way?

Concerning all of this, a thought has been rattling around in my head for several weeks. It goes like this: This is what happens when amateurs are in charge.

Whatever happened to valuing age and life experience, trusting the collective wisdom of the people who traveled this life before us? Why are we all so quick to throw out time-tested, tried and true principles/life lessons these days, falling head over heals instead for whatever is new, popular, politically correct or simply marketed well? Isn't there something to be learned from those who have gone before us? Something?

Now that I am older, I am valuing the input and recommendations of those who have gone before me a lot more than I ever have before. Also, as much as I like giving people multiple chances and helping them to learn in this life, I am beginning to think we can't afford to do that much more when there are so many grossly negative consequences for doing this when amateurs are in charge.

My advice to you (even though you aren't necessarily asking me for it!) is to look around and find someone close to you who has traveled this life well and learned a lot from it. Hang around that person. Learn all you can from them. Ask questions of them. Take notes. Be willing to accept the fact that you more than likely don't know it all (I know that that revelation will be a shock to some of you!). Recognize that there is always something to be learned from someone else. Maybe even someone as old as me?

Who knows? Maybe you'll actually discover something really valuable from the experience and be able to take that something to an even higher level as you live your life? Who knows?

In conclusion, I just want to leave you with this final thought: really unfortunate things happen when amateurs are in charge.

Crapemyrtles

What's your view of life these days? Is it "everything's on the up and up," or are you a little bit more pessimistic than that?

I would have to say that there are a lot of things to be discouraged about right now - here in the United States as well as around the world. I won't begin to spell out for you all the stuff that has me personally concerned, but my list seems to get longer and longer every day. And then it either shrinks or grows depending on my attitude and/or how I choose to view life at that moment in time.

But, when I really think about it, I have to ask: "When hasn't there been a lot to be discouraged about in this world?" Hasn't there always been troubles/difficulties of some sort or another?

Why is it that we are sometimes prone to focus on just the troubles and difficulties in this life? Why is it that we sometimes only see the bad in life and completely miss the good?

That is why I am so glad that God made crapemyrtles.

If you live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, I hope you've noticed how absolutely beautiful the crapemyrtles are this year! I guess the combination of lots and lots of spring rains followed by very hot temperatures is just what the crapemyrtles needed to show off their absolutely gorgeous colors. Wow! Some of the ones in this area are incredibly beautiful!

After noticing crapemyrtles a lot the past few days, I decided it was time to take a photo of one particularly brilliant one on my way home from church today (see photo at the beginning of this blog). I am amazed at how vibrant the color is and how bountiful the blossoms on this one tree! Amazing!

While observing the beauty of the crapemyrtles, I couldn't help but think of the lyrics to a song. It is these words that frequently run through my head whenever I experience something so beautiful in God's creation. The lyrics I am referring to are taken from a song entitled "That's the Love of God," written by Phill McHugh and Greg Nelson back in 1989. It was Sandi Patti who made this song and its words famous/popular several years ago. The lyrics go like this:

What made God take so much care

To make creation glow

He could have made it black and white

And we'd have never known.

So, going forward I am going to try to remember that even when it seems like there is a lot to be discouraged about in our world, I need to stop and check my attitude.

Am I dwelling too much on the bad, not allowing myself to consider something good - like the magnificent beauty of crapemyrtles?

Am I thinking enough about how good God is towards me - about how His creation provides incredible beauty and bounty if we will only stop and take notice?

Have I thanked God today for making living plants like crapemyrtles to explode with color - even though He could've made them black and white and we'd have never known?

In spite of all the stuff that could bring us down and get us really discouraged in this life, let's remember that God gave us crapemyrtles.

Don't just focus on the bad in the world. Allow yourself to focus on the good, too.

What's your view of life today?

Who Moved the Furniture?

My wife and I recently "rearranged" the living room in our house (even if ever so slightly) in anticipation of having some out-of-town guests/family come for a short visit this coming week. We wanted to make our living room a little bit easier for entertaining both in-town and out-of-town guests/family. We also wanted to make the room better for television/movie watching when there are only three of us here doing that.

Anyway, for several days after we did the rearranging, each time I passed through the living room, I thought to myself, "Who moved the furniture?"

Isn't it funny how accustomed and comfortable we can get to things being a certain way in life (even down to the arrangement of furniture in rooms in our houses)? And then, someone or something changes (even if only in a small or insignificant way) and we exclaim to ourselves, "Who moved the furniture?"

The older I get, the more I seem to notice changes, even small ones.

I have found that there is comfort in things being and/or staying somewhat predictable in life. There is comfort in not having to re-think everything each and every day we live. As a matter of fact, it can be downright uncomfortable when you have to adapt to change after change after change after change. Why don't we just leave things the way they are? Why do we have to continually change things?

Well, I've also come to realize that change is just a part of life. Get over it!

As much as I'd like to lock down on somethings and declare them to be totally unchangeable from this point forward, I need to be careful. An attitude like that only leads to unhealthy rigidity, potential alienation of people in my life and maybe even a bad case of ugly legalism. Taken to an even greater extreme, an unwillingness to accept and respond to change leads to a lot of other not so great attributes, too.

On the other hand, there are some things that are worth locking down on and declaring to be totally unchangeable. And that's really O.K., too. Living your life in constant state of change (oftentimes just for the sake of resisting permanence and/or stability) is no more virtuous than living your life unwilling to change. As with a lot of other things in life, the trick is trying to find a healthy balance between constant change and an unwillingness to change at all.

Recently, I traveled to the place where I grew up in Iowa. We visited several family members there. In a lot of ways it seemed to me that not a lot had changed since I was living there 40-50 years ago. I didn't know how I felt about that. Why hadn't this place and the people changed more? What was wrong with them? And then I said to myself that the fact that not a lot had changed was also very good. There were (and are) a lot of things in Iowa that shouldn't change. I realized that even though I had changed a lot from where I was 40-50 years ago, a lot of things also had not changed and that was equally good.

Balancing change, adapting to changes without compromising, and sorting out what really matters in life is key when it comes to change. Wish I had the fine art of it mastered, but I don't. I probably still resist change in a lot of areas, and then am way too prone to change when change is not necessary at all.

So, here's my challenge to all of you reading this. The next time you notice a change, and either remark to yourself, "Who moved the furniture?" and resist it with all your mind, soul and strength or accept the change way too quickly without fully evaluating all the ramifications, I would encourage you to ask yourself the following questions, long before passing final judgment on the change:

- Am I reacting poorly to this change because I am hopelessly stuck and unwilling to adapt to something new and different?

- Am I becoming too rigid and "out-of-touch" with the world I am living in because I resist changes like this so vehemently?

- What did I abandon and/or give-up by accepting this change? In the grand scheme of things, was that abandonment and/or compromised principle worth giving up?

- Is the change I am now facing a change just for change sake? Am I way too prone to make the change just because it is a "popular" thing to do?

- Is the change I am accepting causing me to forget where I've come from and all that was invested in me in the past?

Who moved the furniture?

Less of Me

Day-in, day-out, this life sure can have its share of struggles. And some of those struggles usually are with the people we know and love best of all. Why is it that relationships are so hard sometimes?

Don't get me wrong. When it comes to relationships, I am blessed way beyond imagination! And, I am very, very grateful to God for each and every relationship He's given me. I am blessed by all the people God has placed in my life. Well, almost all the people (smile)...

So, why is it that we sometimes struggle with relationships in this life, especially when most of us are so blessed by all the people we know and love?

I believe the answer to that question is selfishness.

We are all selfish creatures. So, when it comes to our relationships, we want our own way. We'll get along with the other people God has placed in our lives (at work, at church, at school and maybe even in our own homes/families?) as long as they do just what we want them to do. Sound familiar?

Too often, many of us adopt a "my way or the highway" attitude when it comes to our closest relationships. As long as the other person agrees with me and what I think, then we'll get along. However, if they have another idea about a subject and I don't like it, well...

I love it when the lyrics of certain songs provide just the answers we need for the struggles we encounter in this life. I'm sure that all of us have at some time heard a song and immediately it touches our heart. Then, as often times happens, many, many years later those same lyrics are still stuck in your head reminding you of something that touched your heart long ago.

As I was thinking about writing this blog today and consequently mulling over the various events of the past week (which is what I do to get inspired for these blogs each week), one song kept popping into my head. It seemed to be just what I needed to hear again for the struggles I was experiencing with the various relationships in my life.

The name of the song is "Less of Me."

I first remember hearing this song back in 1978-79 at Dundee Presbyterian Church - Omaha, Nebraska. It was a Camp Sunday song that the high school students shared upon returning from their weeklong summer camp. The song really struck a chord (pun intended) with me, especially concerning my specific problem with selfishness. There have been many times over the past 30 years where I've had the lyrics to this song pop into my head, usually when I am in the midst of some struggle with a relationship and don't know what to do. The lyrics go like this:

Let me be a little kinder
Let me be a little blinder
To the faults of those around me
Let me praise a little more

Let me be when I am weary
Just a little bit more cheery
Think a little more of others
And a little less of me

Let me be a little braver
When temptation bids me waiver
Let me strive a little harder
To be all that I should be

Let me be a little meeker
With a brother that is weaker
Let me think more of my neighbor
And a little less of me

Struggles with relationships in this life? Try the less of me approach. It has helped me...

Giving an Acceptance Speech

Today is Father's Day. And, since I have the happy, joyful, wonderful privilege of being a Dad, I've been thinking a lot about that the past few days...

What kept coming to mind as Father's Day approached was giving an acceptance speech. You know, kind of like they do at the Oscars and/or any other annual awards program? When the person who gets the award gets up there and says: "I'd like to thank..."

Well, here's what I'd say today in giving an acceptance speech for being a father.

First, I'd like to thank my God (heavenly Father) for giving me life and breath, and for providing His grace and salvation (eternal life) through Jesus Christ, my Lord. He gave me the most important gift I'll ever receive in this life! He saved me when I was lost. Thank you!

Next, I'd like to thank my Dad (earthly father) for marrying my Mom, and for bringing me into this world so many years ago. He loved me through so many tough times, and still loves me very much even to this day. I'm his only son and he has always been proud of me. He taught me to work and work hard, and always to do my best. Thank you, Dad!

I'd like to thank my loving and faithful wife, Ellen, who has always stood by me, supporting me in countless and incredible ways. She loved me enough (and still does!) to carry all four of our children to birth, thus giving me the fantastic privilege of being a Dad! She has stood by me - day in, day out - for almost thirty years, working very hard to make sure our house is a "home," and faithfully teach our children alongside me. Thank you, sweetie!

I'd like to thank my son, Andy, who always challenges me to consider "dreaming bigger, " reaching for whatever opportunities/goals are next. He's advised me with an unusual boldness when I really needed it, and called me up to places I still feel like I don't belong (largely due to periodic, misguided feelings of inadequacy/unworthiness, as well as times of very low self esteem). Thanks, Andy!

I'd like to thank my daughter, Katie, who always makes me feel so special, as though she's really glad to see me/be with me! She's helped me understand (just as her Mom has attempted to do for many years) that this life should be fun and lived to the fullest. She's also encouraged me to not take myself so seriously (which I need to be reminded of a lot!). She is an incredibly talented, resourceful and beautiful young lady! Brave, too. Thanks, Katie!

I'd like to thank my son, Peter, who so confidently accepts every stage of his life, and then makes it look so easy to be who he is (and do all that he does). He always calls me up to even higher levels of integrity, discipline and faithfulness, probably without even knowing that he is doing that. He's continually demonstrated extreme loyalty to his immediate family, as well as uncommon selflessness to long-time friends. Thanks, Peter!

I'd like to thank my son, Nathan, who always makes me smile, and causes me to laugh at so many things that are funny in life. He's proved himself to be a valuable friend to many, including his siblings! He provides his mother and me the delight of offering a place for his teenage friends to hangout and have fun. He has an uncanny sense for distinguishing right from wrong. He's brought a lot of joy to me over the years. Thanks, Nathan!

I'd like to thank Annie and Kristen, two chosen women who have truly captivated the hearts of my older sons, Andy and Peter. Thank you for being faithful to them, and for providing the companionship that they will need for this life. Thank you for allowing me, at times, to be another "father" to each of you. Thanks, Annie and Kristen!

Finally, I'd like to thank all those who have played strategic parts in helping me learn more about being a godly father, and then calling me up to that challenging task. I'm talking about the pastors, teachers, friends, family members and other acquaintenances/authors who have offered advice and loving instruction when I needed it most. Thank you all for caring enough to make yourselves available to me (and to my children) when "just me" alone would not have been enough. The responsibility of being a father is not something to be taken lightly, not for the faint of heart and not to be accomplished all on your own. No one is completely adequate for the task in and of themselves alone. It takes the wisdom and assistance of many to do it well.

So, if I were giving an acceptance speech for "fatherhood," that is what I'd say. I am a very blessed man today...

The 10 Cannots of William J. H. Boetcker

I ran across some great words in my readings this past week. I don't exactly remember where I read them. But, I thought they were too good not to share them in this blog.

I was originally led to believe that these words were written/spoken by Abraham Lincoln. Upon doing more research, however, I discovered otherwise.

The great words I'm referring to are called The 10 Cannots of William J. H. Boetcker, originally published in 1916, and they read like this:


You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
You cannot help little men by tearing down big men.
You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.
You cannot establish sound security on borrowed money.
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn.
You cannot build character and courage by destroying men's initiative and independence.
You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.


94 years later these words are still very powerful (and also very true!). God bless William J. H. Boetcker for writing them down.

I'm going to remember these 10 Cannots for a long time to come. Too bad these great words aren't "required reading" for all citizens of the United States of America today. We could really use wisdom like this again in our civic/political arena...

Relationships That Matter

Contrary to the unprecedented popularity of several new social media types (including Facebook), there are only a few relationships that matter in this world.

I mean really. Can any one of us really have several hundred "friends" all at the same time? I think not. Consequently, these days my heart yearns for a few relationships that matter. Not dozens; just a few. But, I have found that it is easier said than done.

Take today for example. Today is my Dad's 82nd birthday. He lives in Iowa and I live in Texas. I spoke with him this morning by phone, but really wish I could be there with him in person today instead.

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Not sure why I even wrote that here to him. He'll never read it. You see, my Dad does not have a personal computer, or a cell phone for that matter. He's never logged on to the Internet or sent/received an e-mail. Facebook is an absolute foreign concept to him. He wouldn't comprehend the concept of a Twitter "tweet" even if I tried to explain it to him. And yet, I still have a strong desire for a relationship that matters with him! How is that even possible when we live over 700 miles away from each other? Brief, weekly phone calls on Sunday afternoons just aren't enough for relationships that matter to flourish. There needs to be more, so much more. How I wish there was more in the relationship with my Dad.

I also think about other important people in my life. The people I love. The ones I really should have a relationship that matters with: Ellen; Andy, Annie, Katie, Peter, Kristen, and Nathan; my Mom; my sisters/brothers and their spouses/friends; my nephews/nieces; my close friends; a few co-workers; a few neighbors; a few people at church; etc.

Already, my list of people I really should have a relationship that matters with is up past 60 people. Plus, very few of those on my list live close by or are connected with me in a constant, regular sort of way.

Therefore, I have to ask myself, "Is it really even possible to have a relationship that matters with all of these people?"

I have a strong desire for a relationship that matters with each and every one, but I get terribly frustrated when it seems so hard to actually do! What's wrong with me anyway? Why does it appear that others are able to manage this part of life so well? Or, are they?

While pondering this dilemma, I was drawn to several verses in the Bible (Romans 7:18-20 to be exact). Here's what those verses say in the New American Standard version:

"For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not. For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want. But, if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me."

Not that I am a theologian or anything, but I think what these verses are saying is that when we have a strong desire to do what is right, but get frustrated when we can't do what we want to do and maybe even do the exact opposite of what we want to do, that means it's sin's fault. So, based on that, do I just get off easy then and say that it is an impossible task and just give up when it comes to relationships that matter? No.

I think there are several things I can learn from this whole experience concerning relationships that matter.

First, I need to stop trying to be more than I can really be to all the people/loved ones in my life. I need to better understand that I have a capacity for relationships, and also recognize that I probably will only be able to have relationships that matter with a few. And those few are probably going to be the ones who are either physically or genetically really close to me.

Second, it's discipline not desire that changes things. If I really desire a relationship that matters with someone close to me, then I am going to have to do something more than I am currently doing to make that happen. Just having the desire is not enough.

Third, I need to stop worrying about other people's expectations for me when it comes to relationships. I need to just enjoy the relationships I have and cherish those instead of spending all my time longing for some other relationship to get better. It would be a terrible thing to have no relationships that matter because of fussing over what was missing in so many of them.

I'm going to travel to Iowa with Ellen and Nathan to see my Dad in late June/early July. It will be wonderful to see him on the farm then. I'll have two to three days to demonstrate to him that his is a relationship that matters.

As they say in the Nike commercials, just do it!

Love Where You Live

My pastor is wrapping up a sermon series today entitled, "Love Where You Live." It's all about challenging us to notice the people/needs in our midst and then encouraging us to share the love of Jesus with those people/needs. It's been a great series of messages! Really thought-provoking, and definitely a big call to action. What else can I do for others in my community?

I was in Chicago at a design conference for three days this past week and saw a little bit different version of the expression love where you live there. My long-lasting impression of the people I met in Chicago will be that most of them really know a lot about the buildings, planning and history of their city, and that they will do all they can to tell others why they love their city so much.

I was therefore struck with several "what ifs?" which became the inspiration for this blog.

What if each of us in our own individual communities actually noticed the people/needs in our midst, and then did all we were equipped/inspired to do to help meet the needs of those people?

What if each of us who are Christ followers openly shared the love and grace of Jesus with the people in our communities, and then actually helped them with their needs (both practically and financially) in the blessed name of Jesus?

What if each of us in our individual communities took the time to know a lot more about the buildings, planning and history of where we live so that we could tell others in a compelling way why we love where we live so much?

While I absolutely loved being in Chicago this past week, frankly I couldn't wait to get home on Friday night! You see, I live in Plano, Texas, not Chicago, Illinois (or any place else that might be as "cool" as Chicago). I love where I live!

I love the fact that Plano is my family's home and that it has been for the past 25+ years. I love the fact that because most of my family and friends live here in this area, I get to see them and be with them quite often. I love the fact that my church is here and that we get to minister to the people/needs of this community together. I love the fact that I know most of my neighbors and they know me. I love the fact that we can spend time talking with each other openly and learning from each other as well. I love the fact that Plano is a well-educated and prosperous community, and that I feel safe and "at home" here. I love where I live!

It's always nice to visit other places and learn about them, but the place where you live should be the one you love the most.

Love where you live!

Spiritual Lessons from a Colonoscopy

I had my first ever colonoscopy this past week. Oh boy! I was kind of dreading it, but in the end (pun intended), it wasn't all that bad. Plus, it gave me inspiration for this blog!

Through the whole process of scheduling it, anticipating it, preparing for it, and then actually going through it, I discovered that there are several spiritual lessons from a colonoscopy. So, what follows is my attempt to let you all in on what I learned from this not-so-pleasant medical procedure.

First, I learned that sometimes it's best to just do it! My family practice doctor had advised me during the past five years to get a colonoscopy. Only recently did I decide to do it. My doctor had my best health interests in mind when recommending this procedure. He wanted me to discover if there was something crappy (pun intended) in my body that could lead to unwanted health troubles. Our medical profession has universally determined that on or around your 50th birthday is the ideal time to get your first colonoscopy. I was about five years late.

So, what's the spiritual lesson here? Well, how often has someone with authority in your life (a parent, a pastor, a mentor, an older brother or sister, etc.) suggested that it's time to take care of something really important in your spiritual life and you have chosen to ignore them (even though you might suspect they are probably right)? How often has someone you admire advised you to do something so that you can avoid unwanted problems later in life, but you chose to completely disregard what they've said (at least for awhile)? Sometimes it's best to just do it. Listen to that authority in your life and do what they are telling you to do, knowing that they really do have your best interests at heart.

Second, I learned that it takes a great amount of concentration to completely clean out stuff that gets in the way of improved health. Before I could have a colonoscopy, I had to put my normal routine aside and get prepared for it. It's just not possible to make a spur-of-the-moment decision to have a colonscopy. There is quite a regimen to go through approximately 12-16 hours ahead of the actual procedure. Some might even call it drastic! But, medical experts have determined this to be the best way of getting accurate results and save them from a lot of mess (ew!) while doing the procedure.

So, what's the spiritual lesson here? If you really want to know what is going on in your spiritual life, you just can't discover that without concentrating on it for awhile, taking time to clean out stuff that has built up inside of you over time. For improved spiritual health, it requires both a good amount of time and focused concentration. You may even need to do something drastic (like a complete TV/media/cell phone fast and/or immersion into good reading material for a time). Don't fool yourself into thinking that improved spiritual health will happen without a lot of time and concentration. It won't.

Third, I learned that I needed to allow myself to trust others, as well as partner with someone through the process. When I went in for the colonoscopy, I had to pretty much entrust my life (at least temporarily) to several people I didn't even know. I had to trust that they were capable of doing what they were about to do and that they'd have my best interests at heart. I also needed to have someone there with me for the procedure so that when it was all done they could drive me home. The good news is that the place where I had the colonoscopy was very professional. They seemed to really know what they were doing. They were all extremely nice and seemed to be very accustomed to helping people like me through this process. They knew exactly how to make it as painless as possible for me (yay!). The other good news is that I had the wonderful blessing and companionship of my life partner, Ellen, there with me, praying for me throughout the whole experience (thanks, sweetie!). Praise God for that! I couldn't have done it without her!

So, what's the spiritual lesson here? We all are going to need to trust others for help once in awhile. We should not try to do everything independently, all by ourselves. Improved spiritual health frequently requires others who are highly skilled at helping people, coming alongside us for awhile to do what we really can't do for ourselves. But, we need to make sure they are people we can trust first. Once that trust has been established, then we need to let those professionals (pastors, counselors, church leaders, etc.) do what they are highly trained to do. It also helps a great deal to have a trusted partner alongside you in the process of spiritual health discovery and healing. They can give you perspective and help you when the professionals are done with their part. It really takes a team effort to improve your spiritual health. That's why local church fellowship and having other Christ followers in our life is so important.

Yes, there are a lot of spiritual lessons from a colonoscopy. Actually, there are a lot of spiritual lessons in other places in our daily lives, too. But, you have to be looking for them to discover them...

With LIBERTY and justice for all...

Words in the English language are wonderfully rich in meaning. I believe words should be used carefully and in line with Webster's earliest American Dictionary of the English Language. Sadly, that is not always the case. A lot of words have been hijacked from their original meaning and twisted to accommodate certain agendas, thus causing unnecessary confusion and silly debate at times.

Take the word "justice" for example. The primary meaning of this word from Webster's 1828 dictionary was: "the virtue which consists in giving to every one what is his due; practical conformity to the laws and to principles of rectitude in the dealings of men with each other; honesty; integrity in commerce or mutual intercourse."

By contrast, today the word "justice" can frequently imply the notions of equal distribution of wealth/property, and/or a form of restoration/retribution for wrongs committed against certain groups of people. When you compound word meanings by adding "social" in front of the word "justice," it gets even more confusing. Especially for well-meaning people and men and women of faith.

Who wouldn't want "social justice?"

But, think very carefully before putting your stamp of approval on it. Do you really know what that phrase means for the people using it? Depending on their world view, it can mean a wide variety of things. I am learning that I am really for "social justice" when it comes to some groups/organizations, and then really against it when it comes to other groups/organizations. It all depends on who is invoking the term and where they are coming from both philosophically and politically. I am also learning that you really need to dig deeper to find out the true motivations for "social justice" before you give certain groups/organizations your support.

That is why I have developed a litmus test for "social justice" going forward. The inspiration for this test came from the United States of America's Pledge of Allegiance. At the end of that pledge, it says with LIBERTY and justice for all.

Returning to Webster's 1828 dictionary, liberty means: "freedom from restraint; the power of acting as one thinks fit, without any restraint or control; only abridged and restrained as is necessary and expedient for the safety and interest of the society, state or nation."

Other common meanings for the word liberty include: freedom from arbitrary or despotic government control; freedom from external or foreign rule; freedom from interference, obligation, restriction and hampering; independence.

So, to me that means that when liberty is absent (even when it comes to something potentially wonderful like "social justice"), you have tyranny and/or oppression. I don't know about you, but I have no interest in supporting tyranny and/or oppression. If someone is mandating "social justice" as instituted/controlled by the government, that's where I draw the line. If someone is telling me that I have to give up my freedom in order to promote "social justice," then I will politely say, "No thank you."

Words are rich with meaning and need to be used carefully. We must also be very cautious about the meaning of concepts such as "social justice." Make sure that you look closely at the motivations of those groups/organizations who are promoting it. Don't be fooled...

How Conspicuous is Your Faith?

Most people probably wouldn't consider north Texas and the DFW metroplex to be a significant location for ethnic enclaves of non-Christian faiths. However, I have observed over the past three to five years that this area (like a lot of other predominantly suburban communities in America) is in fact becoming an enclave for several non-Christian faiths.

Don't get me wrong. I'm a Christian, and thus not all that excited/interested in the Muslim mosques (or the numerous Jewish synagogues) close by. But, I am fascinated by and have a great deal of admiration for both Muslims and Jews who appear to be very conspicuous about their faiths. From outward appearances and casual observations alone, it is oftentimes quite easy to discover whether someone is Muslim or Jewish.

Take our Plano neighborhood for example. On Saturdays (the Jewish Sabbath), many of our Jewish neighbors (entire familes) walk to their synagogue because driving cars on their Shabbat is forbidden (unless of course the weather is particularly nasty, thereby giving them an exception to the rule). Men and boys in those families wear their yarmulkes, and frequently the women and smaller children have specific dress requirements as well. Thus, on Saturdays in Plano, Texas, where almost no one is dressed up and out walking around the neighborhood, it is quite obvious which families are Jewish.

What about you? How conspicuous is your faith?

What about me? How conspicuous is my faith?

To assist me in answering my own question, I looked up the word conspicuous in the dictionary. This is what I found for the meanings of that word: 1.) easily seen or noticed; 2.) readily visible or observable; and 3.) attracting special attention, as by outstanding qualitites or eccentricities.

Hmmmm. Is my faith easily seen or noticed by others? If not, why not? Is my faith readily visible or observable? If not, why not? Do the outstanding qualities or eccentricities of my life/faith attract special attention? Positive attention? Why does it seem like only Muslims, Jews and other non-Christian faiths are willing to make their faith conspicuous? Why does it seem like Christians too often attempt to hide and/or succeed in hiding their faith from others around them? What are we afraid of? What are we ashamed of about our faith? Hmmmmm.

Well, here's my challenge to those of you who are Christians (or followers of Christ) this week. Of all weeks of the year, this is the week that you should be especially conspicuous about your faith!

All week long you have an opportunity to be seen or noticed by others for your love of a Savior who even though completely sinless/perfect, voluntarily went to the cross to die for your sins.

All week long you have an opportunity to rejoice in the victory over death that Christ attained by rising from the dead, and make that rejoicing observable by others.

All week long you can make the outstanding qualities of your faith in Christ known and attract positive attention. All for Christ's sake, not your own.

How conspicuous is your faith?

This week, make sure that people know for certain by your godly behavior, selfless actions and unfailing LOVE for others, that you are a follower of Christ. This week, why not let at least one other person know for certain how grateful you are for the ultimate sacrifice Christ made for you on the cross? This week, who in your cluster of relationships needs to know that you are trusting by faith alone in Christ for your salvation, and that you are living in complete dependence on God's grace for eternity?

This is our week, fellow Christians! Make the love and passion of Christ known in all the world!

SQM vs. CED

Several years ago, I came across an unusual (but helpful) concept: SQM vs. CED. Unfortunately, I don't quite remember exactly where it came from. I don't quite remember who should receive the credit for it either. Sorry about that. But, I have carried this concept around with me for a long time, referring to it frequently over the past several years.

So what is SQM vs. CED, you ask? Good question. Let me try to explain.

As we go through this life, we have a choice. We can either Simplify, Quantify & Multiply things, or we can Confuse, Equivocate & Divide things. The choice is ours.

The implied correct answer is that we should all be more about SQM than CED. At least that is my humble opinion. That is also what I have attempted to do, both personally and professionally, and with relatively good success in the process. Let me explain how it works.

Sometimes if I break words/concepts like this down to their root meanings, it helps me better understand truth. For the exercise of explaining SQM vs. CED in this blog, I am even going back to Noah Webster's 1828 version of the American Dictionary of the English Language as I believe current editions of dictionaries have compromised true meanings of some words.

First let's look at the words for SQM and try to understand what this side of the equation is all about.

Simplify: To make simple; to reduce what is complex to greater simplicity; to make plain or easy.
Quantify: To determine, indicate, or express the quantity of; to make explicit the quantity of; to give quantity to.
Multiply: To increase in number; to make more by natural generation or production, or by addition.

Whenever possible, I like to make things really simple. Life is already complex enough. Why make it more so? Who doesn't like it when things are more plain or easy to understand? Wouldn't we all get along better if we attempted to simplify things versus make them all the more complex? Also, counting or quantifying things just helps each of us know where we stand on several levels. There is nothing more confusing than being held completely in the dark as to just what the score is for a particular situation! It is extremely hard to operate with that sort of ambiguity, both personally and professionally. Wouldn't it be better if we all attempted to count and quantify things instead of being content with ignorance of the actual numbers that affect things? Finally, when we multiply and increase numbers, good things usually happen. This is particularly true when it is by natural, conventional means. Growth is generally a good thing. Ever had a plant or a savings account or a stock that didn't grow? How happy were you with it after awhile? Not much, I'm sure.

Next, let's look at the words for CED and contrast them with the words we just looked at for SQM.

Confuse: To mix or blend things, so that they cannot be distinguished; to disorder; to perplex; to throw the mind into disorder.
Equivocate: To use words of a doubtful signification; to express one's opinions in terms which admit of different senses; to use ambiguous expressions.
Divide: To part or separate an entire thing; to cause to be separate; to make partition of; to disunite in opinion or interest.

Who likes it when it appears as though someone is trying to confuse you? When things that shouldn't be mixed or blended are? Who likes a constant state of disorder and/or being perplexed all the time? I have to be honest with you, I hate it when situations are just plain confusing! How about when words are ambiguous and/or the meaning of what is being spoken is doubtful? How about when opinions expressed seem to be completely contrary to our normal common senses? No thanks! Isn't it a lot better to be united versus being divided? How many of us really like it when things separate us? Not me!

So, now you know a bit more about SQM vs. CED. With that knowledge of this concept, what are you going to do about it going forward? May I suggest you consider the following:

1. Simplify, don't confuse things. If it is up to you and you have a choice in the matter, go simple.

2. Quantify, don't equivocate on things. Let's all count things and look for the common ground. Let's all stop the habit of continually changing the equation versus solving the one before us first.

3. Multiply, don't divide. What can you do to grow things? What can you do to unify? Look for those opportunities versus always focusing on what divides.

SQM vs. CED. Try it, I think you'll like it.

Charity vs. Charitable Giving

What a difference a week makes...

Just last week, I finished filing our taxes for 2009, and to be honest, I was very pleased with them when completed. What? How can Vince say that he was pleased with his taxes after completing them? Is he some kind of nut or what? Well, I was pleased for two reasons.

First, we will be getting a refund instead of having to pay. (Actually this is bad news. I really need to make some adjustments to my allowances so that we keep our money throughout the year instead of the government keeping it for us! But, that will have to be the subject of another blog some other day...)

Second, our charitable giving totals were really great! What a blessing to look back on 2009 and calculate just how much money we actually gave away! I will have to admit, however that the deduction we received for our charitable giving was nice, too! :-)

But then, two totally unrelated activities (or were they?) occured that really humbled me and caused me to rethink how pleased I was after completing my taxes.

As God would have it (He's always teaching me through life experiences!), our neighbors down the street who have been struggling for several years financially (and in a lot of other ways - unemployment, poor health, etc.) had to move out of their house on Wednesday. Right on the heels of that, I had lunch on Thursday with a wonderful, godly man from our church and we discussed at length charity and what God calls us to do for the poor in our midst.

Wow. I realized all too quickly that there is a really big difference between charity and charitable giving.

Charity means giving help to those in need who are not related to you. It also means extending the love of God to others in a completely unlimited way. The poor (widows, orphans, the sick and disabled, etc.) are regarded as proper objects for our charity. This means we are to be primarily concerned with providing them with food, water, clothing, and shelter, and tending to them when they are ill. Beyond this, charity can also mean visiting those who are imprisoned or homebound, and/or ransoming those who are captive against their will.

Sadly, like most Americans, I don't think I really understand charity at all.

Rather, it is too easy for me to just practice charitable giving. And then when I have, I all too frequently congratulate myself with what I've done.

So, what exactly is charitable giving? It is giving money to a person or a church or other worthy cause, either directly or by means of a fund or trust. It can frequently just be a religious act or duty. Not that charitable giving is a bad thing. It really isn't. But, at a minimum, it's just not the same as charity.

What a difference a week makes...

Lord, help me to practice true charity in 2010, not just charitable giving. And let me have a heart filled with JOY (not resentment) as I do it.