This weekend my immediate family experienced a "first" - the marriage of our son, Peter, to the lovely Kristen. It was a FANTASTIC experience for all of us and this morning I am still absolutely filled with JOY!
Since it is JOY that is overflowing in my mind and soul today, I thought it would be a great time to express the reasons for JOY in this blog. I have seven. I'm sure I'll think of a few more as the day goes on, but this is what I came up with at 8 a.m.
Reason Number One - To see Peter's face and observe his excitement as his radiant bride came down that aisle, all I could think of was JOY! To see Kristen as she approached Peter with loving parents on either side and tears flowing down her smiling face, all I could think of was JOY! A man and a woman that prepared/ready/willing to commit themselves totally to one another and the Lord they serve is the best reason for JOY!
Reason Number Two - No matter where you are or where you've been or what mistakes you've made, a wedding signals hope for a fresh start and new beginnings. That's why I love going to weddings with my sweet wife, Ellen. Each time I do, it causes me to appreciate her even more and to recommit to loving her for the rest of my life. That's another reason for JOY!
Reason Number Three - How incredible is it that so many family members from far and wide would all gather together in one place just to experience a short 25 minute ceremony at a church? But, a wedding is so much more than that! A wedding is family, and a wedding basically creates a new family. Call me old-fashioned, but family is what really brings massive amounts of JOY!
Reason Number Four - Another incredible thing about a wedding is how willing your friends and family are to help with the arrangements and celebrate the experience with you! As we drove away from the parking lot of the country club where the reception was held I couldn't help but thank God for all of the incredible friends who did so much to make it all possible for all of us to experience so much JOY!
Reason Number Five - For months now, Ellen and I have had to talk and plan and wrestle with the details of our part in this wedding. But, in so doing, we have experienced a great deal of "connected" time with each other, and with Peter and Kristen, and with so many others. These times have definitely enriched our lives and while they involved a lot of work and planning, I wouldn't trade them for anything! All JOY!
Reason Number Six - To witness our other three children (Andy, Katie and Nathan) leading in such marvelous ways as the wedding approached, and expressing so much love for Peter and Kristen in the process, and demonstrating so much unselfishness on their behalf, there is no better gift that children could give to a father than that. All JOY!
Reason Number Seven - I can't even believe that God has allowed me to have this much JOY! Thank you God for giving me the opportunity to be a father and to have this opportunity to experience the wedding of one of my children. Wow! I am a truly blessed man!
The most incredible thing happened as I was finishing this post. I got a text message from the newly married couple thanking us for their JOY! Now I am even more of a blessed man through all of this!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The high cost of leadership
When you are a recognized leader of something, you can no longer be just a "Regular Joe." In the eyes of a lot of people, you can't just say whatever you want to say anymore. Everything that comes out of your mouth will be evaluated/criticized by somebody looking to you as a leader.
Just ask President Obama about this.
This past week, he chose to try to be just a "Regular Joe" on Jay Leno's show (why he would choose to do that as President of the United States is questionable?). Apparently, in the course of talking with Leno about living in the White House, the President was asked about the bowling lanes that are in the basement there? And Jay Leno asked him what his bowling score was? And Obama said he bowled something like a 129? As everyone in the audience started laughing at that pitiful score (?), the President made a very off-handed comment while laughing himself that went something like this, "Yeah, it was kind of like the Special Olympics."
Oops! Hey Mr. President, you can't say something like that now. You are the recognized leader of the United States of America. Everything you say and do is being filmed and recorded, and your life is now under a microscope. The whole world is watching! You can no longer be just a "Regular Joe" and make wise cracks like that.
Needless to say, President Obama had to quickly apologize to several people, not the least of which was the head of the Special Olympics program. And this all had to be done within hours of the gaffe, just to make it right with everyone and contain the damage caused by his words.
The high cost of leadership.
But, it's not just President Obama who has to watch what he says/does. If you are the recognized leader of something, you have to watch what you say and do, too. As much as you might want to just be a "Regular Joe," people will be evaluating (and possibly criticizing?) your every move.
I am always taken aback at my work when people say something to me that reveals that when they look at me and/or listen to what I have to say, they are thinking, "This is coming from a Senior Vice President and the Chair of the Design Council." Likewise, at my church the same thing happens and the words might be something like this, "These are the words/actions of a Life Group leader and elder of our church." Even at home, my family can sometimes be shocked when I laugh at something, enjoy a certain movie or say something that might be a little bit different than what they would normally expect from just plain ol' Dad. No more "Regular Joe" for this guy!
Am I complaining? No. Is it frustrating at times when people have much higher expectations of you than they should? Yes. Is it good to have high standards for the behavior of our leaders? Of course.
If you are a leader of something, you should set a higher bar for your behavior and be a better example of living than a lot of other people. But, leaders make mistakes and have feet of clay, too. Sometimes they are just "Regular Joe" people who have reluctantly stepped into visible leadership positions and are completely depending on the grace of God to carry them through (and not make too many mistakes!).
The high cost of leadership can be expensive for a "Regular Joe" like me.
Just ask President Obama about this.
This past week, he chose to try to be just a "Regular Joe" on Jay Leno's show (why he would choose to do that as President of the United States is questionable?). Apparently, in the course of talking with Leno about living in the White House, the President was asked about the bowling lanes that are in the basement there? And Jay Leno asked him what his bowling score was? And Obama said he bowled something like a 129? As everyone in the audience started laughing at that pitiful score (?), the President made a very off-handed comment while laughing himself that went something like this, "Yeah, it was kind of like the Special Olympics."
Oops! Hey Mr. President, you can't say something like that now. You are the recognized leader of the United States of America. Everything you say and do is being filmed and recorded, and your life is now under a microscope. The whole world is watching! You can no longer be just a "Regular Joe" and make wise cracks like that.
Needless to say, President Obama had to quickly apologize to several people, not the least of which was the head of the Special Olympics program. And this all had to be done within hours of the gaffe, just to make it right with everyone and contain the damage caused by his words.
The high cost of leadership.
But, it's not just President Obama who has to watch what he says/does. If you are the recognized leader of something, you have to watch what you say and do, too. As much as you might want to just be a "Regular Joe," people will be evaluating (and possibly criticizing?) your every move.
I am always taken aback at my work when people say something to me that reveals that when they look at me and/or listen to what I have to say, they are thinking, "This is coming from a Senior Vice President and the Chair of the Design Council." Likewise, at my church the same thing happens and the words might be something like this, "These are the words/actions of a Life Group leader and elder of our church." Even at home, my family can sometimes be shocked when I laugh at something, enjoy a certain movie or say something that might be a little bit different than what they would normally expect from just plain ol' Dad. No more "Regular Joe" for this guy!
Am I complaining? No. Is it frustrating at times when people have much higher expectations of you than they should? Yes. Is it good to have high standards for the behavior of our leaders? Of course.
If you are a leader of something, you should set a higher bar for your behavior and be a better example of living than a lot of other people. But, leaders make mistakes and have feet of clay, too. Sometimes they are just "Regular Joe" people who have reluctantly stepped into visible leadership positions and are completely depending on the grace of God to carry them through (and not make too many mistakes!).
The high cost of leadership can be expensive for a "Regular Joe" like me.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Aspiring to be a "Third Brother"
Unfortunately for me, I am the only boy in my family of origin (except for my Dad, of course). I have two wonderful, older sisters, but no brothers (even though I did have a foreign exchange student brother from Norway live with me for a year in 1971-72). Fortunately for me, God blessed Ellen and me with three sons (and a terrific daughter, too). Andy, Peter and Nathan have experienced all the beneficial aspects of "brotherhood," including the great time they had together this past weekend for Peter's bachelor party in advance of his marriage to Kristen on March 28th.
Brothers are something special. I've seen it in my son's lives. But, today I am aspiring to be a Third Brother. What is that you say? Let me explain.
One of the ways I keep up on current affairs is to read World magazine - my favorite! That every-other-week publication has several excellent writers. One of the best is Marvin Olasky. He usually has something really relevant and thought-provoking to say. His writing usually causes me to think extra hard from a Christian world view about what's really happening in the world around us. He really hit the nail on the head in the February 28, 2009 issue with his article entitled "Prodigal Sons." (See link below.)
http://www.worldmag.com/articles/15022
In this article he suggests that we should aspire to be a Third Brother, that is as opposed to the other two brothers in the biblical story Jesus told about the Prodigal Son.
I am commiting today to try to think/act/speak like a Third Brother should. In these confusing times when there is so much as Christians that we could react negatively to and/or get really angry/disheartened about, a Third Brother would take a different path than that and be more concerned about changing people's hearts, not necessarily their actions, their words, their politics, their religion, or their views.
Read the article yourself and then think about it. Do you aspire to be a Third Brother?
Brothers are something special. I've seen it in my son's lives. But, today I am aspiring to be a Third Brother. What is that you say? Let me explain.
One of the ways I keep up on current affairs is to read World magazine - my favorite! That every-other-week publication has several excellent writers. One of the best is Marvin Olasky. He usually has something really relevant and thought-provoking to say. His writing usually causes me to think extra hard from a Christian world view about what's really happening in the world around us. He really hit the nail on the head in the February 28, 2009 issue with his article entitled "Prodigal Sons." (See link below.)
http://www.worldmag.com/articles/15022
In this article he suggests that we should aspire to be a Third Brother, that is as opposed to the other two brothers in the biblical story Jesus told about the Prodigal Son.
I am commiting today to try to think/act/speak like a Third Brother should. In these confusing times when there is so much as Christians that we could react negatively to and/or get really angry/disheartened about, a Third Brother would take a different path than that and be more concerned about changing people's hearts, not necessarily their actions, their words, their politics, their religion, or their views.
Read the article yourself and then think about it. Do you aspire to be a Third Brother?
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Whatever happened to gratefulness?
Last week, we received the sweetest hand-written thank you note from a very special person in our lives. In it this sweet person actually expressed a lot of heartfelt gratefulness for something we had done - gifts given. How nice! Tonight I will need to sit down and write a couple of hand-written thank you notes to special people who showed me great kindness/love and generous hospitality this past weekend when I was in Arizona. I am so grateful for what they all did to make my visit/stay nice and I don't want to take that all for granted. But, I actually started rationalizing in my head the following thoughts: "Do I really need to write a note? Didn't I thank them enough in person already?"
Whatever happened to gratefulness in our culture/society? Why did I even think that I could get away with not formally thanking someone for kindnesses shown/gifts given?
In light of the current situation we find ourselves in as the United States of America, I am wondering if the biggest problem we have as a nation isn't the fact that we have somewhat forgotten our manners and how to be grateful? We have been blessed beyond imagination as a people, and yet it seems like all we hear these days are complaints and lots of people shouting "What about me? What are you going to do for me?"
What if everyone who read this post decided to start thanking God (and each other, as appropriate) for all the ways we have been blessed and/or assisted in each other's richness/well-being? What if our first impulse at the start of each day (and throughout the course of each day) was to continually thank God and the people in our lives versus just accept blessing upon blessing without ever thanking the One who has given so much? What if the most common words out of our mouths (and written down) were words of gratefulness? Doesn't it seem to you that a lot of our unhealthy self-absorption and fussing over silly issues would somewhat melt away if we were more concerned with who we could thank versus who we should complain to?
What about you? When was the last time you thanked God for your life and each breath and hope for tomorrow and your very existence? When was the last time you actually took the time to write a hand-written note to people in your life thanking them for a gift or some other kindness they bestowed on you?
Whatever happened to gratefulness? Let's make a decision today to bring gratefulness back to our daily routine. Let's set the bar higher than those around us by always being grateful and then watch to see how attitudes and outlooks about life get transformed when we model gratefulness (versus self-absorption and complaining). Give it a try!
Thanks for reading this post! I am grateful for the freedom to be able to do this!
Whatever happened to gratefulness in our culture/society? Why did I even think that I could get away with not formally thanking someone for kindnesses shown/gifts given?
In light of the current situation we find ourselves in as the United States of America, I am wondering if the biggest problem we have as a nation isn't the fact that we have somewhat forgotten our manners and how to be grateful? We have been blessed beyond imagination as a people, and yet it seems like all we hear these days are complaints and lots of people shouting "What about me? What are you going to do for me?"
What if everyone who read this post decided to start thanking God (and each other, as appropriate) for all the ways we have been blessed and/or assisted in each other's richness/well-being? What if our first impulse at the start of each day (and throughout the course of each day) was to continually thank God and the people in our lives versus just accept blessing upon blessing without ever thanking the One who has given so much? What if the most common words out of our mouths (and written down) were words of gratefulness? Doesn't it seem to you that a lot of our unhealthy self-absorption and fussing over silly issues would somewhat melt away if we were more concerned with who we could thank versus who we should complain to?
What about you? When was the last time you thanked God for your life and each breath and hope for tomorrow and your very existence? When was the last time you actually took the time to write a hand-written note to people in your life thanking them for a gift or some other kindness they bestowed on you?
Whatever happened to gratefulness? Let's make a decision today to bring gratefulness back to our daily routine. Let's set the bar higher than those around us by always being grateful and then watch to see how attitudes and outlooks about life get transformed when we model gratefulness (versus self-absorption and complaining). Give it a try!
Thanks for reading this post! I am grateful for the freedom to be able to do this!
Sunday, March 1, 2009
God Help America!
The more common expression for the first two centuries of our existence as a nation has been "God Bless America." But, given the current condition/status of the United States of America, I don't think we can ask God to bless our country anymore than He already has. Rather than more blessings, I am beginning to think that our greatest need is for His help, not more blessings.
Take the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (the so-called "stimulus package" passed by our Congress recently) for example. Is anyone else tired of hearing about how this act is going to "save the day" for us and make everything right again in this country? Even if that were true (and I believe it is not), at what cost will this "saving the day" happen? And more importantly, who's going to pay for it? Seems like we are acting more and more like Alice in Wonderland or Pollyana as a country these days. We are willing to believe just about anything and anybody (to our apparent long-term detriment). We are all hopeful that "this too shall pass." But, is that really being responsible/wise? Have we crossed the line and there is no turning back to the way things once were?
Read the following quote attributed to Alexander Francis Tytler, a Scottish history professor at the University of Edinburgh. Apparently, this is what he had to say about democracies (similar to our form of government here in the United States): "A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always vote for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship. The average age of the world's greatest civilizations from the beginning of history has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, nations always progress through the following sequence: from bondage to spiritual faith; from spiritual faith to great courage; from courage to liberty; from liberty to abundance; from abundance to complacency; from complacency to apathy; from apathy to dependence; and from dependence back into bondage."
From the looks of things in the news these days, I would have to say that at 233 years (and counting) we as a nation are dangerously close to the "dependence" stage in our democracy and heading towards the "bondage" stage at the not too far away end of our democracy. You can hardly deny the facts. They are all around us. I guess we've had thirty-three more years than the average democracy, but that is hardly any consolation for those of us who really love this country and what it's stood for. God Help America!
So, what do we do? Just wring our hands and give up? Hardly. Seems to me the best thing we could do as individuals (and as a nation) at this point is to fight with all our might against all the "traps" that got us to this place. If you have abundance, don't let it cause you to be complacent. If you are complacent, don't let it cause you to be apathetic. If you find yourself apathetic towards this great country of ours and really don't care about what happens (politically, morally, governmentally, etc.), fight against allowing yourself to grow dependent on anyone or anything other than God. Fight! The existence of our nation depends on you and me. Do something/anything to avoid slipping into a bondage situation with our government. It's not too late, but we are closer to the end than most of us imagine.
God Help America!
Take the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (the so-called "stimulus package" passed by our Congress recently) for example. Is anyone else tired of hearing about how this act is going to "save the day" for us and make everything right again in this country? Even if that were true (and I believe it is not), at what cost will this "saving the day" happen? And more importantly, who's going to pay for it? Seems like we are acting more and more like Alice in Wonderland or Pollyana as a country these days. We are willing to believe just about anything and anybody (to our apparent long-term detriment). We are all hopeful that "this too shall pass." But, is that really being responsible/wise? Have we crossed the line and there is no turning back to the way things once were?
Read the following quote attributed to Alexander Francis Tytler, a Scottish history professor at the University of Edinburgh. Apparently, this is what he had to say about democracies (similar to our form of government here in the United States): "A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always vote for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, which is always followed by a dictatorship. The average age of the world's greatest civilizations from the beginning of history has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, nations always progress through the following sequence: from bondage to spiritual faith; from spiritual faith to great courage; from courage to liberty; from liberty to abundance; from abundance to complacency; from complacency to apathy; from apathy to dependence; and from dependence back into bondage."
From the looks of things in the news these days, I would have to say that at 233 years (and counting) we as a nation are dangerously close to the "dependence" stage in our democracy and heading towards the "bondage" stage at the not too far away end of our democracy. You can hardly deny the facts. They are all around us. I guess we've had thirty-three more years than the average democracy, but that is hardly any consolation for those of us who really love this country and what it's stood for. God Help America!
So, what do we do? Just wring our hands and give up? Hardly. Seems to me the best thing we could do as individuals (and as a nation) at this point is to fight with all our might against all the "traps" that got us to this place. If you have abundance, don't let it cause you to be complacent. If you are complacent, don't let it cause you to be apathetic. If you find yourself apathetic towards this great country of ours and really don't care about what happens (politically, morally, governmentally, etc.), fight against allowing yourself to grow dependent on anyone or anything other than God. Fight! The existence of our nation depends on you and me. Do something/anything to avoid slipping into a bondage situation with our government. It's not too late, but we are closer to the end than most of us imagine.
God Help America!
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